It came to my attention today that I will not be stop-lossed. For those who don’t know, to be stop-lossed means that your original contract with the military has been indefinitely extended. This stops the military from losing you to your family. Anyway, it has become knownst to me that I will not suffer this consequence, because my unit will be somehow immune to this. Also, I cannot be forced into another unit while I am in the military. So, all of this means I WILL OFFICIALLY LEAVE THE ARMY ON TIME. Yes! [Continue exclamation marks for the next mile of text.]
Below: Me shortly after hearing the
news that I wouldn’t be stop-lossed.
[Photo circa 1944]
Needless to say, I am ecstatic. This is easily the best news I’ve had in 2008, and possibly better than any news I recieved in 2007, or maybe even 2006, too. In fact, it could be the best news I’ve gotten since I’ve joined this abominated organization.
I’ve even developed a plan to help me better enjoy the moment:
Shout “Yes!” at random times during the day.
Repeat as necessary.
I feel really good.